Sometimes I can annoy the hell out of me.

I can get real philisophical at the drop of a hat. Really. And if I was listening to me, I would get tired real fast.

For example, last week I was at R@lph's, waiting in line, when I'm thinking stupid bullsh!t actor-y stuff, like "I need new photos...which photographer should I use...who should I send them to..." blah, blah, blah, gag.

Then the two people in front of me were discussing a film that wasn't even out yet, and talking about how it should be marketed, etc. And in the next line, there were like four young actors talking about agents and auditions, and how to get more work, etc. And the magazine racks all had celebrities on the covers, the newest diets, how to make your ass look great, etc.

And for those few seconds, it felt like my life became a small cog in a huge machine called Hollywood, and I really felt how small, insignificant, disposable commodities actors are in this town, and how this industry doesn't look at us as people but as products, and how in the end it's all about money and humanity falls by the wayside, and I just thought "I gotta get the hell out of L.A. soon or I'll just freak."

And last night I was up late (surprise). I was watching this religious program (just out of curiosity...and in the end, it made no sense to me), and afterwards, there was this informercial about this new piece of exercise equipment which is basically a bent stick that you hang on to while you do aerobics and it works your entire body. Whatever. But the guy who was selling it, and everyone in the infomercial was so focused on the amazing-ness of the product that sometimes I wanted to say "IT'S JUST A STICK! What are you people, BLIND?"

And then it went off again, my philosophical streak, thinking about the history of humanity. From ancient times, when we looked to the sky and tried to figure out when would be the best time to harvest and hunt, how we understood nature and worked with it and its goals, and how we have evolved from beautiful creatures that were part of that cycle, into people in tights trying to scam people into forking over tons of money for a fucking stick.

I could go on all day about this, but I can't. I got bills to pay.