So I'm at my Afternoon Job™. It's about 1:45am. See? Told you it's that time of the year. Aaaaaany-hoo, my Morning Job™ boss wants me to come in earlier tomorrow morning (about 9:30am - I went over this before, but yes, 9:30 is fucking early for me). But he KNOWS I'm working late at my other job. In fact, he sometimes helps out at my Afternoon Job. But he wants me to come in early anyways. I usually show up earlier when he asks, but when I get there, it's just an extra hour of doing nothing very important...nothing worth going in early for. So, I figure, since he knows I'm tired, he's making me come in early so he can take advantage of my sleep-deprived state and brain-wash me. I don't know what exactly, but I'm afraid I'm going to become a pawn in an international game of intrigue and espionage. I'll be used as a weapon to dismantle failing governments, following orders blindly to steal state secrets and sell them to countries desperate to extend their claws of influence over large regions.

The sucky part is that, since I'll be brainwashed, I won't remember any of it.